You get past a number of blocks and finally feel that wave of relief that things are finally clicking into place... bam! Another block appears, just as you're getting into the rhythm of forwards, you're knocked backwards again. Sitting on the ground staring up at the new block.
No one says it's easy, if they do, they're those arrogant people that have such an irritating smile there is nothing you'd like better than to wipe it clean off of their face. Everyone is quite clear that life is hard, there is no easy route through and life will regularly grab the rug from under you feet with one quick, devilish movement.
Curves on Trend had a short yet glorious run of things going to plan, our samples came back and they were perfect. Just what we wanted. Then came the time to find a manufactuer... how is it possible that there is no one that does what we want them to do?
We finally found one but they charge such an extortionate fee for even just the pattern, it felt like a block falling on top of us. Where do you go when you've exhausted your list? How do young start-ups make it when the tools are in place? It just makes other peoples recent success more impressive.
Then the British Plus Size Awards abrupt cancellation blew a giant hole in our plans last weekend. It was nice to see my brother for dinner but I felt the pain of the cost we'd put out to attend the event and it was all wasted. I'd been so excited to take one of the CoT skirts out for a spin, and with lots of women from the industry planning to be there as well! Boom! The entire plan was gone.
We went Christmas shopping instead and I went over my card limit. I've not even finished Christmas shopping yet... I've run out of money this month at least and I've run out of ideas. I'm not even sure what to do next.
On the job front, I've been doing ok recently. It's busy, it always is. Then bubs job has had some recent changes, they've brought in way too many people in my opinion for the job and now it's forcing everyone to cut back their shifts to make room - how is it fair for a company to cut back everyone's shifts to make room for more bodies? Where is that chat about a living wage? They might be paying well hourly but if you keep cutting the shifts back then monthly earnings will be less than the living wage dictates.
I sometimes wonder where some of these companies get their information from, or how they come to their decisions because from my point-of-view they don't seem to make much sense. I'm not saying I'm an expert of decision making in business but a bit of logic wouldn't go a-miss. So now, when I'd finally thought everything was settling down, bubs jobs in question.
It's truly exhausting. What I'd like to do at this stage is curl up in the house for the month, watching Christmas movies with bubs and my family, going out for nice walks in the frost and wrapping presents with no worries. I imagine that will always be too much to ask for. What I'd really like this Christmas is less to worry about.
Money worries always seem to be the highlight of the "worry list" - don't have enough money, must pay off debt, don't have savings, want to buy a house/flat... the never-ending monetary worries. I will get this sussed. Money will not rule me or my life, it is there to enhance and to support a standard of living and life.