It was one of those moments where you catch a look at yourself in the mirror and the view you get... Is. Not. Attractive.
I know I'm plus-size, I know where the fat is and what I wear to minimise that appearance - but this was one of those moments that I got a bloody great shock. To the point I turned back and stood in front of the offending mirror and glared. Taking in the details, and the horror that I'd become dismissive of the mirror in the hallway. This was the first time in a long time that I was standing in front of the mirror and taking accountability for my sugar-addict lifestyle.
I have taken a hint and bought "no added sugar" chocolate for diabetics, to cut out a huge amount of sugar whilst still being able to have some chocolate when I need some. The next trick will be to reduce portion sizes and start eating healthier again. I don't know that I've dropped the ball with the healthy eating, we don't eat a lot of red meat, we primarily eat chicken - I definitely need to put more fish back into our diets, but I need to up the veg and fruit intake. It's all a bit traumatic.
After reading success stories from Forks Over Knives, it just re-iterates the benefits of a vegan lifestyle. So after reading a bit more about it all, I think we might start by incorporating one vegetarian meal a week into our normal routine. A re-introducing breakfast would probably be a bonus!
I'm done, I really am. I am at the biggest I ever want to be and it's time I started taking my health and my appearance more seriously. I'm approaching my 27th birthday and let's be honest, thinking about my future is the priority. I constantly barter ideas with my career, am constantly making decisions, trying new angles but I've always been slightly lazy (because it is hard) with weight. It's time.
I want to find a mentor, a coach to help me get through (or to even just start) because I do need some support. I need to do this for me, for my future, for any future children I expect to have - I need to do this now.